Basic Rules If You Want To Get Married

Lots of guys on this part of the internet propose not getting married…

Instead, they insist that you live a childless, consumerist life of Marvel comics, porn, videogames, prostitutes, endless work, and bitching on the internet.

Hmmm, I wonder what agenda they might be pushing…

thinking emoji

As you can tell, that isn’t a healthy option for men. It sure sounds like a healthy for big businesses.

Fortunately, that terrible option is not the only option.

Yes I know, the current marriage laws in the US suck. But it’s not completely impossible to have a good, happy marriage. Plenty of American men have good marriages.

Here are some basic rules for getting married:

Don’t Get Married

First, you can be married in practice, but not legally married. This is obviously the best option. My grandfather never married my grandmother, and their ‘marriage’ worked fine until he randomly got cancer and died.

So yeah, don’t actually get married unless absolutely necessary. You’ll save yourself a massive headache. The tax savings and spousal immunity in court aren’t worth the potential alimony.

Only Get Married If You Want Children

This one should be obvious.

ONLY MARRY A WOMAN YOU WANT TO HAVE CHILDREN WITH

My 40-year-old neighbor in the US has a 37-year-old wife… they don’t have any children. They don’t plan on having any children.

It works fine for them, I guess (?). Their life seems kind of boring compared to my similar aged neighbor with 4+ children, but not my problem.

That said, why even get married?

Marriage is 100% risk for the man with literally no reward. You basically have a girlfriend that gets 50% of everything you own after a breakup. Imagine giving 50% of everything you own to your ex-girlfriend…

That’s the situation my neighbor could find himself in.

Also, marriage doesn’t even exist until you have children together.

Absolutely retarded on all levels.

Don’t Have An Expensive Wedding

This falls into the personal finance category more than marriage. Though it’s still relevant because most divorces are caused by money*.

Expensive weddings are retarded. I mean, if you (or your future-wife) have a rich family willing to pay, then it’s whatever.

Most Americans are fairly poor. Yet, they spend $30k on a wedding. For what?

Some cool Facebook and Instagram pictures that no one cares about. My dad bought a house instead of an expensive wedding and an expensive ring (my mom lost it anyway… lol).

My parents’ wedding probably cost $300. Pretty cool, and they’re still married.

Save the money for your future children (see #2).

*Most divorces are initiated by women because modern men don’t know how to treat women. Women just use money as a socially acceptable excuse.

Marry Unambitious Women

pregnant woman

Yet another trap guys fall into – they want ambitious women. They get this hilariously bad idea that women are actually competent from Hollywood movies and television.

In reality, women suck at everything they do. They will mess up everything they touch, too. Like the Midas touch of doo-doo.

With that in mind, you don’t want an ambitious woman. Period. Just no. Please, trust me on this one – I’m from the internet.

Ambitious women will simply try to one-up you on everything. All women do this, but an ambitious woman will take this to the extreme. If she has a male boss/co-worker that has some charisma, well…

She’s going to find her male boss/co-worker more attractive than you. If he knows how to treat women (very important), then he could easily fuck her.

Sorry, that is simply how women work.

You want a woman that is content being barefoot and perpetually pregnant while you make money at your job. She should enjoy cooking, cleaning, and giving you blowjobs.

Women with that feminine demeanor usually look and age better than some Sheryl Sandberg wannabe.

Why the hell do women want to “work” when they can sit on their ass at home with your/their children in exchange for cooking, cleaning, and some sex?

That seems like a damn good deal to me. It’s better than the alernative of working 80 hour weeks making $50,000 a year while popping anti-depressants to handle an existential crisis.

If you disagree with me, then…

Don’t Be A Fucking Faggot

The final point. Really, this is the most important point on the list.

Don’t be a faggot.

Not the homosexual type… don’t be a homosexual, either. That’s definitely worse.

Anyway, I’m talking about the male feminist type of faggot. You know the type, the guy that wears a shirt that reads “This is what a male feminist looks like” type of guy. The type of guy that voted for Hillary Clinton.

cuck soyboy

The type of guy that we would call a cuck.

A disgusting human being. They often have a punchable face.

Yeah, that’s the kind of guy that will get divorced by his wife. She’s certainly cheating on him. Trust me, I’ve been with women married to those guys.

Don’t be that guy.

You can read my article on how masculine men view women for info on that. My entire site has plenty of information on that topic, so does Heartiste.org.

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